Matt Writes Words

thoughts about movies, writing, and whatever else is on my mind

Month: October, 2011

The Zen of Cinema

I love movies in which nothing much happens—the ones that take their time, that emphasize poetic images and moments and give us enough time to soak all that up.

While I appreciate well-told stories, I do find that the emphasis on plot will get my mind a little too active. I’ll sit there and try to figure out what’s happening or where the story is going, and while that can be fun, it also fills me with a kind of anxiety that I often become self-conscious of, which then takes me out of the experience. Then, I’ll start wondering when the climax is going to come, and when the movie is going to end so that I can go home and get something to eat.

I know that a lot of moviegoers get annoyed with movies that don’t emphasize story, as if there is nothing else a movie can offer. There has to be conflict, resolution, action, a beginning and an end, otherwise they’ll say, “What was the point of that movie?” and mean it as less of a question than a statement that the movie was a waste of their time.

Most moviegoers have very specific expectations of a movie, and they often get angry when a movie does not fulfill that expectation. Sometimes it doesn’t fulfill that expectation because it’s a bad or inept movie, but sometimes it’s simply because the movie was trying to do something else instead.

There’s all sorts of things that a movie may be interested in doing instead, but I’m going to write specifically about the slow film that emphasizes mood over story. Even in these films, there is almost always a story, and it’s usually very clear. So, I suppose I shouldn’t say that there is no emphasis on story, but rather that there is not a lot of story. There is minimal story.

One of my favorite films is OLD JOY, which tells the story of two men. They’re old friends who have not seen each other in a long while. One of them has followed the traditional notion of growing up, and has a stable family with a child on the way. The other has held onto his college self, still bumming around with no money but seemingly carefree. They decide to catch up and go camping for a weekend at a natural hot springs in the forest. They get lost for a while, but eventually find their way. They never do really get into their old rhythm, as time has put them on separate paths. So there is this unspoken discomfort during the trip. Then they come home, and will probably never see each other again. That’s the whole plot.

It’s one of those movies in which, if you are waiting for something big to happen, you will be disappointed. So can you just sit and experience the film without holding it up against your specific expectations?

The reason I titled this post “The Zen of Cinema” is because I find the above question to be one of the central tenets of Zen thinking, with it applied to the whole of life. Can you experience things as they are without holding it up against your specific expectations? If you can’t, you are doomed to suffer, because it takes a lot of effort to bend yourself and others into some particular shape, and it’s never going to be what you expected anyway. Having your eyes on a specific outcome for the future means a lessened ability to see the fullness of this moment.

So, taking this idea and going back to cinema, I’ll write a bit about why I like OLD JOY so much. Plot-wise, it’s about as simple as you can get. There isn’t a whole bunch of dialogue, and what’s spoken is mostly unimportant. What’s there are beautiful images, with that kiss of film grain that sends my soul aflutter (the movie was shot on 16mm film). There is the sound of the birds in the trees. It quiets your mind and you begin to see perfection in everything. The film is, as all films can be with the right mindset, a joyful experience of the perfect shots in the perfect order, with each shot/edit/sound/piece of music saying everything and nothing all at once. Meaning becomes a very small idea; experience becomes all.

Films like this work their magic in the moment, and if you can see it as it is, in this moment, in every moment, without worrying about whether or not you’re understanding what’s going on or what just happened or where this is all going, then the experience can become so full and perfect. It becomes a meditative experience, clearing the mind with its stillness, allowing the clutter to dissipate so that one can see with clear eyes and an open heart.

This is not necessarily what cinema is meant to do, and not a lot of movies are interested in doing this, which is fine. I love all kinds of cinema and cinematic experiences. This post is just about one kind of experience that I have gotten from a few movies, and I take these movies as welcome reminders that there can be so much fullness in experience, even with nothing is happening.

Trusting the Present Moment

I’ve been listening to podcasts and reading a lot about Zen philosophy lately. Since it’s been on my mind, I think I’ll be writing a bit about it in the next several posts, just to help me sort out my own thoughts.

One of the basic ideas in Zen is to be in the present moment as much as possible. Dwelling on the past and being anxious about the future are major sources of suffering, and the mind will spend a lot of energy and time going in circles over what it can’t control anyway. The past and the future don’t exist–all that really exists is this moment. You can only make choices and take action right now. You can only find peace in the present.

I have always been able to let go of the past fairly easily. I don’t really dwell on things after it’s finished, whether it was a good memory or a bad memory. However, I find it difficult to not think about the future. I’m always anxious about the future, going over plans again and again in my mind, clinging onto my ideas of the future in order to gain a sense of safety and comfort. But that sense of comfort and safety is and will always be an unknown factor. I don’t know what will happen in the future.

There is a degree to which planning is helpful. Planning is perfectly fine, but I must be able to let go of some particular result, or else I am setting myself up to get upset when things don’t work out in the way that I had planned it.

I am getting better at not being upset when things don’t work out as planned, but my main hang up is going over the same plans over and over again, in order to gain a sense of control. That control, however, is an illusion. And I don’t particularly want to be in control (which is good, because I don’t really have much control). Replaying the future over and over again in my mind mainly serves to make me anxious about whether things will work out the way that I thought they would.

All of this is based on wanting some particular result–otherwise, there would be no need to plan. However, attachment to particular results is a major source of suffering, because things often don’t work out as we planned, and even if things do work out, we were anxious about it every step of the way. This can and does prevent the enjoyment of things in the present moment. It can and does prevent the enjoyment of life.

The present is the fullest moment, the only moment, the only point at which “truth” has any meaning or use. We can only be honest in the present moment. We can only be whole in the present moment. Wholeness and honesty is not something to be chased down in the future. Wholeness and honesty require the present.

And this is why, theoretically at least, trusting the present moment over our plans and goals is a better path toward happiness. If one is honest and happy in the present moment, it leads you toward more and more of that. It may lead you away from what you thought you wanted, which is scary. But if what you wanted required working really hard and suffering through something you hated in the hopes of One Day Getting What You Want And Being Happy, then what’s to say that you won’t be bitter and disappointed if and when you finally get what you had chased after, if it was enveloped in all that hate and suffering?

Lots of plans involve sacrifice in the present moment so that we can have what we want in the future, but that is no way to live a peaceful and happy life, unless you were happy to make those sacrifices.

What’s scary about not having specific goals, though, is the great big question of what the future will be like and how it’s all going to work out. We often want to KNOW or feel like we know how everything is going to play out, and we want to build our lives in advance. To say, “I will follow what makes me happy even though I don’t know where it will lead me” requires tremendous trust, especially when that way of living starts to lead you down some unexpected or unusual path. Following that path, though, can lead to much fuller and interesting experiences, and doing what you love to do can make you better at it.

Being able to bring these interesting experiences to what you love to do might well be that magic factor that will bring you success in what you love to do, or you may discover something else entirely and find success in that. It might not be financial success. It might not impress anybody. But if it can lead to a fuller and more interesting life, filled with gratitude and present-mindedness and peace in the heart–I’d call that a successful life.

Zen and Existentialism

Having been interested in Minimalism for the past year, I suppose it was inevitable that I would start becoming interested in Zen ideas. I’m not particularly compelled by the Buddhist aspect that is usually attached to Zen, although I am not repelled by it either, as Buddhist ideas and practices were always present, in some casual way, in the Asian culture that I grew up in.

One of the main links between Zen and Minimalism is the notion of letting go. In Minimalism, one develops a mindfulness about what is and is not necessary, and then the idea is to let go of that which is not necessary or helpful, in a physical sense (getting rid of things; not accumulating more things). Zen, as far as I have gathered in my early stages of studying it, involves the same thing, except that it is emotional baggage and concepts of self that must be let go of.

We are attached to particular meanings that we associate with our experience and our desires. We become attached to certain expectations of how we are supposed to be, or perhaps we become attached to the notion that we are entitled to something. These meanings that we attach to our lives and to the world are, ultimately, the cause of the emotional suffering that we feel.

Here is where I see common ground between Zen and Existentialism: they both acknowledge that, in general, people attach particular meanings to things. Those meanings are usually not questioned, at least not in a radical fashion. I’m sure that most people are familiar with the feeling of existential dread (angst), especially when they wake up in the morning and have to go to a job they don’t like so that they can pay for things that they don’t really care about that much. I’m sure that most people have asked themselves, “What’s the point? Why bother?” But I don’t know how many people really stick with that trail of thought, because ultimately it leads to some pretty dark and scary places. For them, these questions may never be satisfactorily answered, or some may find solace in religion or spiritual practices.

Existentialism considers these questions, and basically operates from the premise that there is no inherent point or meaning to life. We assign these meanings to things, and we get emotionally caught up in these meanings and expectations and concepts of self. In being mindful of the lack of inherent meaning, we can, hopefully, take the opportunity to assign meaning by active choice. The potential of meaning is broadened, and I find that to be a very positive idea.

We have particular social understandings and expectations that are thrown at us every day. Zen and Existentialism meet at the point where we can identify those already-formed meanings, and be able to let them go. One must be able to view the world in a detached way in order to better observe things as they are.

Both of these philosophies are famous for the radical detachment aspect, and as such, many people tend to think of Zen and especially Existentialism as being about nothingness or emptiness in a negative or defeatist way, when really, those thoughts are merely the first (necessary) step toward creating new meaning. Those meanings will bend and shift and grow with our experiences, giving us the opportunity to experience the world through many different perspectives throughout our lives.

Yet, when some meaning fails to hold the weight that we put on it, we must be able to step off of that particular meaning. There is no reason to stick blindly or doggedly to any meaning, since it constructed by us in the first place, and we can construct new ones. This, to me, is the appropriate use for meaning—as temporary platforms to stand on to be able to act in this world. Without these platforms to stand on, we are unable to operate, as we need something to push off of in order to progress. We would be depressed or suicidal without meaning.

To use a goofy analogy, meaning is more like software than hardware. We can consider the physical world, including our bodies and brains, to be the hardware. Our ideas, however, are virtual. Not only are they adaptable, but we can also abandon old software and start using new software, or have many different pieces of software that we’re using at any given time—each piece of software serves its own purpose, and you use it accordingly.

The reason to be against taking any particular sense of meaning too seriously is that there is no idea that truly holds the whole of everything. Rather than adapting our ideas to new experiences, we twist and contort what we experience into our comfortable sense of meaning.

This is strikingly clear in politics, where every event and idea has to fit into the narrative of “we’re good and smart, and they’re bad and stupid.” This certainly illustrates the constructedness of meaning, because two political parties can talk about the exact same event and arrive at opposite conclusions about what is going on. However, there is no awareness of the constructedness and meaninglessness of it all, and so they get angry, sneaky, greedy, and competitive. Being right becomes more important than anything else, and politics becomes a game to win instead of a means to facilitate the betterment of peoples’ lives.

Rather than getting so emotionally tangled up in these silly ideas of right and wrong, why not try to develop a mindfulness about whether these ideas are hurting us or helping us? We can prevent so much of our own suffering if we can learn to do that. Of all the ideas and things that we are attached to, very few of them actually matter or are worth suffering for. It’s not feasible to just drop our attachments all at once, as these attachments are so very sticky. However, the ability to detach seems to me to be a valuable aim, because then when we reattach ourselves back to the world, it is done so on our own terms.

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